I am giving myself a raise. After all, our nation’s top CEOs receive 349 times their average workers’ salaries. Therefore I really should be paying myself $9,460,000 per year or maybe I need to cut my employee’s wages down to $343 per year to be in line with the big guys. All things remaining the same, we should be paying Barack Obama $26,690,000 to run our country, but I think the Tea Party might take exception.
I suppose the raise idea wouldn’t go over well with my shareholders, employees and creditors. They might actually think I have completely lost it hell we all have lost it. Gleaning every last penny of profit at the expense of quality workers, quality products and our environment has enabled these CEOs to pull the wool over their board’s and shareholder’s eyes to the point of blinding all of us. Our collective quest for economy has ruined our economy.
Of course I may be completely off the mark on this one. I suppose I could inform my employees about the new pay-day loans available at the bank that enable the bank to collect up to 240% interest on the borrowers’ debt. This will probably be a huge success next year, so much so that the banks board will reward the CEO with another raise. Ironically banks are supposed to be in business to loan money to small businesses so they can expand their enterprises, employ people but they aren’t doing much of that right now.
Sitting at a black jack table last Saturday night amongst what may only be described as a working crowd at our town’s new casino made everything crystal clear. If we don’t pay our people enough they will get the pay day loan and attempt to parlay it which leaves precious little for our local economy.
Please excuse me as I am going to call my board meeting to order now. Hit me.